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Amber's Journal

Mar. 13th, 2010

11:49 pm - Soon Enough You're Gonna Think of Me.

So, today's entry is just a song to sum up me today. These ups and downs are killing me. The ups are so up, but the downs are so... ouch.


Current Mood: annoyedannoyed

Mar. 9th, 2010

11:51 pm - I know she likes the sunrise...no longer sees it with her sleepy eyes

My excerpt from cantr forums:

"I'm pretty sure I'm fucking things up, but I can't be bothered to care. I'm so run down and exhausted that every time I move it feels like ten things break in me. For the first time in my life I feel like if I had a hole, I would crawl into it and bury myself alive, just to be able to stop, but if I were to stop I feel I'd go crazier. "


Before I touch on that, I have to do the dirty and admit I've been sleeping with A.M again. Tsk tsk baby, huh? I could tell you I tried to say no, but anyone reading this would see right through that. Car sex = +10 bad girl factor.

I'm almost graduated, hopefully March30th is the date I'll be done, though I've been ditching out on my clinical because I have issues. Issues which I feel stupid for even trying to say, other than that I'm so uncomfortable being in that nursing home.

I did make a friend up here I been hanging out with, A.B. She's younger, and wild and up front like me. It's refreshing. A.P from college has been talking to me more, she's begged me to call her if A.M comes up here this weekend, if only so she can yell out something like man-child at him.

So, sadly throughout the course of writing this, I've decided I don't want to talk about the first paragraph, sue me. I'll leave the reader instead with two lovely links.

First, one of my fav online comics. http://www.xkcd.com/708/

And, Chris Rock - Kill the messenger. Okay, that's not a link. But go find it on todou!

Current Mood: where the eff is the "meh"mood

Jan. 10th, 2010

04:21 am - It gets so sticky down here..

I'm seriously disappointed in the communities that surround two games I play. It's like mods have gone slack, and allowed this mutant massive meta-gaming community to move into one, and this idiotic disrespectful community of PKers to move into the other. It's driving me away from what I previously loved.

Also, I have a crush. L.P. That is all xD

Current Location: ma room
Current Mood: bitchybitchy
Current Music: when the weight comes down - tragically hip

Oct. 1st, 2009

03:56 am - It's not elementary, my dear watson.

I know, I know, months. I suck at this. I'll try harder. It's been rough.

First off I want to just ask this. Is there ever a time in your life where the burden being put on you is something that you want to touch, but at the same time, you just can't. I've had a moment, where I just wanted to throw my hands in the air and say "I can't deal with this! I don't know what to say! I don't know how this is handled! I don't have enough life experience with this to help you! I'm just a kid! Why?!"

For the person to whom is responsible for giving me this feeling, I am sorry. I am sorry if what I said wasn't helpful, in fact, I'm sorry if it seems I didn't try. Because I didn't, I'm well aware of that fact. I gave up, but you don't have to.

As for the school and work thing, gah if I bitch about that one more time, I might explode or implode or someplode.

Also, everyone knows me. Relationship wise,they know how I am. But I said three weeks ago to my sister, and I've said it to B.H and A.P., if I settle down with anyone, there'd be one person I'd do it for. Yet I've inserted foot into mouth on that one, believe you me. Is all hope lost.

/end emo-blog.

Current Location: my bed
Current Mood: coldcold

Jun. 23rd, 2009

08:32 pm - Fantooooooostic

I have heatstroke, and am angry that I've lost yet another day of school. So two weeks plus one day. Anyways it's causing me not to think right, and as much as I want to fill in on the days I've missed, no one will miss a real entry terribly.

So, I was bored and looking up quotes and found some coded ones that weren't done too bad so...enjoy, and comment on their merit if you want..


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Current Location: living room leather
Current Mood: sicksick
Current Music: catch me up

Jun. 16th, 2009

07:37 pm - Growl.

Before I get into the first day at school, I have to post this conversation had at dinner.

Muma: Where's M-A-X?

Me: Over H-E-R-E

Muma: O-K-A-Y

Jess: *giggles*

Me: Heh Y-O-U-SPACE-S-U-C-K

Muma: F-U-C-K

Me: L-E-A-R-N-2-G-R-A-M-M-A-R

Muma: Huh? You lost me, what's that mean?

Jess and Me: Learn2grammer.

Muma: *waves hand dismissively*

Dad: B-R-B

*table silence while everyone stares at dad*

Dad: Gotta go.

*table errupts in laughter as dad walks away*



:D My family can be silly. Anyways firsst day went so bloody awful I can't even be bothered to explain it for the fifth time. I hate my boss. End of story.

(P.S. Fettuchini Alfredo with seasoned chicken chunks. Mmm)

Current Location: Bed.
Current Mood: tiredtired
Current Music: Nadda

Jun. 15th, 2009

12:46 am - Random thought

You know what I just thought? Have you ever watched Dog the Bounty Hunter?

I love how they try to be so inconspicuous while hiding out to catch a bail jumper, yet, they sit around in low neighbourhoods of Hawaii in big ass black Suv's.  Are you friggen serious? Lol.

And as a friend pointed out, they all have bullet proof vests and pepper spray cans and paintball guns loaded with mace rounds, they kinda stand out. But hey...they have sunglasses...so it's all good! (Direct quote!)

And beth puts on a bandana and thinks it's a good disguise.

Jun. 14th, 2009

10:11 pm - My little heart attack

Well hai.

I was thinking about my post yesterday, the whole time I was walking the four dogs today, and the most amazing thing happened. Remember I was talking about the Great Dane pup last time? Well, I ran into another great dane today. One from the same parents, an earlier litter. And as much as I though Jade was nearing full size (she's almost as big as the black sheppard, and that's big) boy oh boy was I ever wrong.

Honestly, I've seen many Great Dane's in my lifetime of kennel work, but never like this. This Great Dane was not a dog, it was a bloody horse. It stood beside myself, and what I thought prior were big dogs. It's haunches stood between my hips and my waist, it's head at my chest level(he wasn't even holding it up!). I'm 5'6".

I was thoroughly amazed by this horse-like dog. The thing was ALMOST two years old, so was going to grow more. I've never been more glad to have three docile friendly dogs in my entire life, because all of them, and the boxer out of it's muzzle, could not have taken that thing down had things gone south.


I was supposed to try Rhubarb Strawberry pie tonight, but I never got around to it. A shame, since  I love rhubarb.


Oh yes, and now I'm having a panic attack of sorts, though someone made me laugh and calmed me a bit. I have to drive to woodstock (20 min drive) by myself tomorrow to a place I've never been for an interview to confirm my course spot for the PSW course. I'm freaking, I hate woodstock roads, and don't know them that well. And I don't want to parallel park in those tiny woodstock parking spaces in my beast of a truck.

Recommendation for the night, an comic that starts around some indie friends, and introduces some interesting characters throughout.  There are 1425 pages made to date, and I'd recommend going through the whole thing.  Questionable Content is for you if you think this sounds good. It's neat to see how much his characters change throughout this, as his skill increases, and he gets better at twisting the plots.


Current Location: living room couch
Current Mood: anxiousanxious
Current Music: Movie - Nacho Libre

Jun. 13th, 2009

11:50 pm - Corresponding Branch to Central

Question. Why does it feel so good to shower and crawl back into bed? It feels like it should be illegal!


Honestly, I barely did anything worth doing today. Still waiting for the truck to be fixed, hopefully by monday or I'm screwed with a capital FUCK.

Imagine this. You're walking down the street minding your own and round a corner, to see the following:

A husky, and a black shepard, walking neck to neck, ears up.
A boxer, armed with a muzzle and a spike collar, growling like it's going out of style.
A great dane, not full size, but getting there, hopping, bringing up the rear.

How would you react? For one poor Ingersoll woman, this meant startling, and taking a few steps back, to land on her ass. For a few others, a double-take and a quick crossing of the street. For the man we passed sitting on a bench, a damn near heart attack.

Which brings me to my next bit of questions. The three large unmuzzled dogs, would you not think they were friendly? I mean, one of them is being walked by a 9 year old. If they were mean, wouldn't they have muzzles like the boxer?

As for the boxer, why are you scared of a dog in a muzzle? Because muzzle means 'will bite'? It could mean 'will bite dogs' or 'will bite strangers'. You just don't know. And at any rate, it's muzzled. It can't bite. So what are you people so worried about?

Ugh, That's it I guess. Its cold in here by the way.

Current Location: Living room couch
Current Mood: coldbrrrrrr
Current Music: Movie "Mindstorm"

Jun. 12th, 2009

03:40 pm - Stafford Bells on the Loose.

Seriously, someone needs to smack me for not ever doing what I say.

Anyways, M.L. made me realise I've not done this in awhile, so I may as well update.

I'm all settled in fingerhole and shit. I've been going to these seminars over the past few weeks, which have been interesting enough. Found out my personality type is ENTP. Also, did an aptitude test, and have a high aptitude for any job imaginable. No joke. If you don't believe me, I'll take a pic of the test so you can see lol. Doesn't really give me much in the field of career clarity though.

Great news today. I got a call from S.O., the Red Cross rep. I was originally going to have to wait until October to get into my course, as it's booked full (started june1st). Apparently someone dropped it, and the open slot went to me. I start Tuesday. Mother fucking yes.

Let's see....bathed the cat today, and took the husky to the groomers. Kicked the boxer, but that was an accident.

Hungry, loving the blog unamusement.blogspot.com/
 The end. Grawr. Must write more meaningful posts in future.

Current Location: ma room.
Current Mood: amusedamused
Current Music: sound of silence - simon and garfunkel

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